Complaint After Complaint

Anyone that knows me knows that I love to complaint. It's just something that I do. I love it so much that I created a website where my friends and I gripe and complaint about all the things that are wrong with the world. It's not a downer, it's just an amusing little place to let off some steam in a light and humorous way. The site is updated all the time so come back again and again. You can visit the site to see peoples comments or subscribe to the sites RSS feed.

So please, travel over to Complaint After Complaint and check it out.

Thanks and I hope to see you soon.

Being jaded is something you earn, not something you can learn:

Recently I met some one. It's funny. You meet people and you think that you are compatible only to find out that the person you met isn't the person that you know. It's unfair if you ask me. I mean, you spend all this time only to prove yourself wrong. It's insulting to you and it's insulting to me. As the same time, it's not your fault. No one can tell the future, so you don't know what's going to happen. Also, you can't predict what a person will be like in five years.

My son is going to be a rocket scientist or a police officer when he grows up. He's going to go to the greatest college and graduate at the top of his class and marry a nice girl and they will live happily ever after.

We all have hopes and dreams. We all make predictions, but what is a prediction other than a guess that you have some facts behind? Nothing. You can use science and predict what is going to happen, but how many times have you gone outside dressed appropriately and then when you get outside, you notice that the motorcycle that you drove to work is covered in snow and has been moved to a different town in a tornado? I rest my case.


Back to my original statement only to lose it in a thousand word trail off again.

Meeting people. It's a task isn't it? You meet people everyday and what do you remember? 10% of the people? I've been working retail for years and have repeat customers that know me, but honestly lady, how many people do you think that I see every day? Enough to know that your sons name is Donald and I sold him a pair of shoes 6 months ago? Here's your receipt. Have a nice night. So I met someone. I don't know what did it either. She's marvelous. It's not everyday that you meet someone so completely incredible that you drive 4 states to see them. I'm also going to stress the fact that anyone can drive four states. It's not that hard, but anyone that has to drive through the lovely state of Ohio gets more points. That's all I'm saying. I met her through my roommate. Great friends for years. She came to visit out of the blue. I'm not going into details because I only do that in social situations. Blogging for me is like a sum up of long stories and great facts that would be perfect enough for any witty coffee cup or day by day calendar. Now I've got a question for you:


Q: How can you meet someone that changes things that you've taken for granted without saying a word?


This girl came to my house and I told her to pick out some albums to listen to. She looked and looked and saw my ridiculously elaborate and eclectic collection of music. She then proceeded to tell me that I listen to the worst music ever, but I do it so heartfelt-ly, that it actually makes bad music, good. I took that statement to heart. I have a passion with music. Often times I think that I listen to too much music, but then I remember what music has done for me and all the friends that I have made through it and retract anything that I have ever said bad about it.


So I have a couple days off and decide to drive to Chicago from Buffalo to see her.


I've am jaded, but with good reason. I've hated girls and I've loved girls. I've been deceived, slapped, cheated on, insulted, and even thrown up on by them. Somehow I keep coming back for more. It's like a masochistic cycle that I do to myself. It's like those pictures that you keep under your bed or your nightstand or in your wallet that you can look at that makes you tear up because of the reminiscence of the good times once had. It's like the though of a special song that no matter how many moons goes by, you still can't listen to it without thinking of that special someone. So she tells me, "Mike, bring as much bad music as you can." I can't turn down an offer like that. I filled an entire shoe box and CD booklet with albums. Some good, some bad, all awesome. I throw a few on, she wasn't feeling it. That's what it was all about. Letting people in on guilty pleasures and secrets when it comes to music. Then it got messy, and it goes like this. I play a record. I've listened to this record 50 times by myself, but never like this. I pressed play and all of a sudden, I found myself on the floor...I've never felt like this to music. She didn't say a word. As a matter of fact, she was walking around. Maybe it was the time, maybe it was the place, but I couldn't get myself off the floor. I pulled her down to the floor and made her listen to it. I think that she felt the same way. She let out an "Ooohhh." sound so I can only assume. It seemed that after that song, everything that I played after it was complete gold and glued me to the floor. How can one person do so much without doing anything at all?


Now comes the challenging part of any relationship. Admitting to one another that you like the other person. It's easy if you want to be a jerk, throw all these emotions on the table and say, "You can do with these as you please." I don't think that I've ever jumped the gun when it comes to talking about feeling, but something that I haven't done is let them sit for a while so that I can be sure that what I feel is what I really feel. Hatred and love are the same emotion. Sorry to have to be the one to tell you. You feel passion, you feel passion, brother. Whether it's good passion or bad, you've got it, and you've got it bad. I am very anxious to just open up and let her have it, but I know better. After all these years of heartbreak and love, I have learned a lot of things about them. You can tell a girl that you love her, but do you have any idea why? Sure, she puts out and the sex is great, but what else've you got? Fine, she likes you as a person. Can you talk? Probably not. It's not hard but no one seems to know how to do it. Let me give you a lesson in the art of dialog. You don't talk to people. Being a good listener is a great quality but doesn't mean a thing if you can't contribute anything back. A rock is a great listener, so is your favorite stuffed animal, but go ahead and ask it what you should do and see how far you get. You've got to have something to add to the conversation. You've got to leave them with something. You've got to leave them wanting more. I used to be the worst ever at telling stories and it wasn't until the other day that I realized why. The reason is because I wasn't doing anything with my life. I was holding back on myself and I was holding back on my actions. Do something with yourself and you'll be able to relive it over and over again. Somehow I can find something to add onto anyone’s stories. Spend a single day with me and I'll talk your ear off, but I'll need your help with it. Talk with people. I hear about people that leave their husbands and wives and boyfriends and girlfriends because there just wasn't anything to talk about anymore. There is always something to talk about; you just have to make some stuff up. Make up scenarios. If someone says, "I got fired from my job." tell them something along the lines of "Oh man. You should have flipped out and went to the coffee maker and thrown it in your bosses face and then thrown a handful of pens at him." Then you are talking and living in an amazingly cheerful fantasy land. You'd be amazed at how thrilled you are to see a person if you've got good conversation skills with them.


I'll leave you with that. It's been a long one, I know. I've touched many topics and you know what, I don't think that I even addressed the initial point, but it's not all about me. I'm not selfish.

You don't have to take me home but you could take me seriously...

So I have been doing some thinking and it's finally occurred to me. I am one of the most genuine people that you will ever meet and if I meet you a couple of times, you can rely on me for just about anything. Close friends know this and I make it knows. One of my best friends needed a place to stay and asked me two days ago and today I helped paint his room in my apartment. He's now got a place to get his mind right for a couple days. This is not the point of this rant, but it does play an important part in the rant as a whole. Discussing this with a friend for some time in the car, we came to the conclusion that people just don't take me seriously. Anyone who has met me will know that I tell stories. Not lies or made up ghost stories, but stories of my life and my past. 98% are funny situations that I would love nothing more than to entertain people with all night long. I have a personality that allows me to say just about anything to someone and have it come out right or at least be interpreted in a manner that is appropriate to the situation. In a time where I am being generous and outgoing, say, allow someone to sleep in my bed because they are not at home, it's being done out of the goodness of my heart, not out of some seedy plot of something bigger and better. You know what I mean. I am completely honest with everyone that I talk to. I just simply don't do things that I think are wrong so I can share my life with everyone just as it happened, and with no shame. Sure, I have done some dumb stuff, but so have you. I'll throw it all out there and all my close friends know me for exactly who I am. Now that I am single again, I have no choice but to “play the field”. It’s tough, man, let me tell you. After being in a relationship for over 2 and a half years, you forget the rules. You forget how to play and what works and what doesn’t. This brings up the point of the story. When I am talking to a girl and she says something like she is tired and doesn’t want to drive home, I wouldn’t hesitate to let you sleep in my bed and gladly take the couch. Ask any lady that has slept over and let her tell you where I slept. Problem is, when I try and convince them to stay, I feel like a complete dirtbag. I know that I am not doing anything wrong, but I can’t help it. I am just doing what I think a good friend should do. I offered you my bed; I didn’t ask to have sex with you. My generosity gets misconstrued as jokes and gets shrugged off. I am not going to change what I am doing because this is how I work and this is how I operate, but it is frustrating.


There really isn’t a closing statement to this. It’s not like I am telling a story that has an ending. This is what is going on in my head and in my life. I can deal with it one day at a time, but I just hope that somewhere along the lines, people will realize that I can be taken seriously about things.

The documentation of my quarter-life crisis vacation:

Here was the idea behind the quarter life crisis vacation:

I had 2 days off and RJ had the same two days off. We decided that we would get in my car and drive. There would be no planned destination and we would never get lost. How can you get lost when there is no destination? We will drive for as long as we need and to get wherever we want. Anytime we wanted to skate, we could. We had a trunk filled with skateboards and longboards, a few loaded cameras, tons of music, and one pack of molasses cookies. Here is my documentation of the trip.

Day 1:

We started out voyage at about 7 o'clock yesterday. W got the essentials. Arizona Iced Tea and a giant foam finger that says "Fuck Off" that the attendant at a gas station thought was really nice. W really had no place in mind, a couple places that we wanted to go, but we could only do so much before we ran out of time. We were going to met our friend Jen in Liverpool which should have been a 2.5 hour trip, but it quickly turned into a 4 hour trip since we took "Back roads" and it took us super-time South-East and when we went North, it turns out that we went like the equivalent of 30 minutes on the expressway. It's alright, because it is what we had in mind for the trip. Yesterday we skated at some school on voyage to Jen's. It wasn't as cool as I thought but it had to be done. When we rolled into Jen's neighborhood, it was about 11:00. We met the parents and then we went to the Casino. Normally I hate Casino's, and RJ has never been, but last night, I won $60 on Video Keno. Then we went to a horrid restraint with "the winnings". When we left, Jen's dad was up $500 and he is still there now (its noon the next day). Good for him though, he's got some good luck. Today we might go to the Carousel Mall and maybe a skate park, but there is the small chance that we will go to Pennsylvania and get fireworks and hopefully blow up fruit and action figures. So far it's been awesome and we are only like 1/3 of the way through. RJ and I need a cold one.

Day 2:

We went to two malls with Jen today. The Carousel Mall was huge but uneventful. I think that the whole reason that we went was for pants. There was one style that RJ found, but they didn't have the right size, so we walked around the mall a little bit and then went to another mall that I don't remember the name of which is fine because they didn't have the pants either. We went to this great bread-based restaurant and ate and then took Jen home.

In the morning, I had talked to my ex-girlfriend, Becky, from Albany and told her that I had a couple of days off and would like to come and visit her for a bit. RJ and I took the two and a half hour trek and visited her and her new house (and old boyfriend). It was really nice to see her as I haven't seen her in about 3 years. We went to Hooters...which was whatever step less than awesome. It was great to talk to her and catch up, but I'm not down with the whole boob gimmick restaurant theme. Luckily, we killed two birds with one stone and the Hooters was located in a mall where we found RJ's Holy Grail of pants. He was thrilled, I was thrilled, but we don't think that Becky liked the new me and the only RJ. After we got back to Becky's house, we hit the road to visit some friends half way across the state in Corning at a beach house type situation. Jen was one of those friends and so was Holly, both girls from Buffalo that we see almost every day, but was cool to see them "out of their element". RJ and I got lost due to some directions, but made the most out of it and skated a parking lot. Then the ladies came to meet us and we went to met Holly's mom and went to the cabin/lake house., wait, cabin-style lake house, wait...rustic lake house. We played card games until 5:30 in the morning and then when the sun came out, RJ and Jen decided to go rowing and I have no idea what Holly decided to do. Due to all the driving, the only thing that I wanted to do was sleep. Now, we are just sitting here on a picnic table contemplating what time that we might go home, what we want to eat, whether or not we are going to get in that boat. By the way, I am documenting, topless...with a bandana\: nipples.

Day 3:

So we got in the boat. RJ rowed out and I rowed in. We are basically naturals. Then we thought that it would be a good idea to take a little hike, and we were right. It was so awesome out there in the woods. We went to a waterfall and RJ took some incriminating and sexy photos that if anyone wants to see can see them. Then we headed back to Holly's house and then up to Syracuse. Actually, it was in Mattydale. I got some spicy cherry chicken, RJ got some really spicy tofu that he hated and Jen got a bad soup, so it was a 1/3 successful meal. Then we had to take Jen home and head back towards Buffalo. On our way back, our friend Dallas told us that there was construction in Geneva and she had been sitting there for over 45 minutes. We got to around that area and took a detour in Weedsport. We took some route and as we were driving down the road, there was a car with its lights on waiting for something. Then we passed him and he promptly turned in our direction. He followed us like 5 miles in the Town of Tyre and we thought that we should get active about the situation. So I stepped on the gas and hit 80 in a 45 and the guy was gaining on us! We didn’t know what to do so we just toughed it out and went where we needed to go. H eventually turned in a different direction and we got back on the expressway and continued on with out journey, only to find out that we got back on the road the exit before all the construction that we got off to avoid. It was alright thought because we made it through in no time and with little time delay. At about 11:45, we made it home and as tired as we were, we went to our respective homes, took showers, shaved, and got back together to watch a movie that I promptly fell asleep during.

---

RUNDOWN

1 car

2 friends

1000 dead insects on my car and windshield

832 miles

1 cooler filled with Arizona Iced Teas (ones)

1 state

2.5 days

0 destination

---

It was a spectacular trip that helped RJ and I clear our heads. We will take another one soon, I hope.

I haven't gained weight, so why am I dragging myself around?

So it's taken a few years but it finally set in. What? You ask? It's a little thing called DEPRESSION. I don't know where it came from, and I didn't really see it until last night when my friend Katie told me that I had been mean lately. Well now let's look back, shall we? It probably started about a month ago when I debated whether I was going to stay with my girlfriend of 2.5 years. She told me that some thing was wrong, and I didn't think that anything was. Last week, we broke up, and that was probably the start of the breakdown. Another thing that has been itching is the fact that the shop that I work at is friggin' dead. No one is coming in here, and it's saddening to think that, once again, another Phatman Skateshop will close it's doors. I am not saying that it will, and it probably won't, but the thought is there. I am doing everything in my power to save this place, but it seems that the boss doens't really want to listen. I don't blame his when he comes in and the whole day before we sold under $300 worth of stuff. I personally do so much stuff arounf this shop it's appaling:

1. I run the eBay store singlehandedly


2. I work here as a manager


3. I work at the flea market every weekend and have to be there at like 8-9 in the morning.


4. I have been working on a super in depth Phatman website that I can only hope will bring some people in the shop

So I do all this and get like one day off a week and I still have to hear that the store was a bit of a mess. Not, "Holy crap, you are saving me $1000 by doing this website yourself. Thanks for all your work." I mean, I'm not searching for compliments, but I would like a little bit of appreciation.


I think that's what's killing me the most. I have been working and doing everything that I can and it just seems that I am "just the computer guy" and nothing else. Now, today, less than a week before my 23rd birthday, I feel that I am dragging myself around like as if I was 16 and a misunderstood teenager that hates his parents but loves Korn. You think that you will outgrow the confusion that society hands us like it's a pair of pants, but you don't. You just have to find different places where it comes from and deal with it. I have learned alot of things from my time here, and I can tell you on thing right now.

Don't plan your life ahead of time.

It's like dominoes. Not the way the game is actually played, but they way that little kids play it. You have all these dreams and desires that you set up for yourself. I want to go to this school and marry this person and get this job in this state and with this company. I want this dog and live in this house and I want my hair to be this color. Well guess what? You don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, friend. So now you've got all these dominoes set up and one thing falls through and it all falls right on your lap, conveniently so that you have no choice but to deal with all of it at the same time. It's quite powerful isn't it? The dreams that once were to make you happy now are making you sadder that you have ever been in your life. I'm not the kind of person to just complain about things like this and just say, "Eh, it'll figure itself out.", becuase then you will just have this snowball effect of things that you have to deal with.


I now have alot of time to deal with this. I moved to downtown Buffalo, NY and my roomate is out of town for the next 6 weeks. I will be lonley but will have tons of other friends living minutes (walking) from my house. I will not be bored. I'm taking care of the situation one day at a time, and without "professional help". Friends are better than the best psycologist will ever be. Friends know you better than any guy that charges you to sit in a chair for an hour a week. Next time you see your friends, give them $5 and tell them thanks for dealing with your crap all these years. 'nuff said.

While some got crippled, the rest gained apathy:

I realize that it's been quite some time since I have posted anything, so for anyone that actually reads this, I apologize. So what's been going on?

Well in Minuet news, Josh, our beloved drummer, has (kind of) quit the band. He said that it was because nothing was happening and because we haden't toured or anything, but I don't really think that's the whole reason. The reason that I said "kind of" is because he is still willing to play shows, and still comes to practice...sometimes. Either way, we are in this pickle where we don't know what to do as a band. I said that we aren't breaking up until more of the CD's are sold. I have a case and a half at my house sitting in my dining room collecting dust.

In positive Minuet news, we just finished our acoustic song for a 7" that is being released on All Things Ordinary. I can't wait to hear what everyone else has done. We did the song Heather Graham, so learn the original and then get blown away by the acoustic version. I actully played guitar the whole time, and I think that it came out mighty-nice.

We have one final sweet show coming up, and a possible radio spot that will be broadcastd live on the internet so I will keep you informed on that. The show that I hope you come to is:

February 9th
@ Broadway Joes
w/ Cru Jones (sweet dudes)
Minuet
+ TBA

I am slowing down on all my collecting business. I am looking to buy a new car and have to save as much mony as possible. In the meantime, anyone who wants to buy my sweet '99 Honda Civic DX hatchback is more than welcome to do so.

Work has been really slow. It's this whole area. Buffalo is filled with wimps that fully depend on the weather to shop. "Oh, it's too cold to shop." The weather channel scares people away all th tim by predicting thes huge snowstorms and then everyone stays in their house and doesn't come out. EBay isn't much better. I'm keeping all this stuff up there and nothing is getting anything worthwile as a bid. I think that we need to experiement with other products, but when it's slow on eBay, I get really bored and irritated by the same reiculous questions about products.

In a topic completly unrelated to everything else that I have mentioned, I would like to get into microcontroller programming. They offer a few classes here at school, but there are about a thousand prerequisites for it. I will probably just teach myself. They also sell kits online that I will most likely purchase and upgrade to do things that they weren't supposed to do. Someone leave me some love.

Great, now you've got cancer...

Yeah, that's right. My girlfriends dad just got diagnosed with lung cancer. Pretty impressive since he never smoked a day in his life. Which brings me to the following point:

"LUNG CANCER IS THE MOST INSULTING OF ALL CANCERS"

Think about it. You never smoke, and you live in "Smoke Free NY" (even though all the bars that I go into, people still smoke) and you still get lung cancer. F-you, you non-descriminant bastard. He's still pretty young in the eyes of cancer, so I think that they might be able to get rid of it pretty cleanly and without alot of hassle. It's a good thing that he works for a pharmacutical company and can, and hopefully will, steal all the meds that he needs. Holy crap, I'm straightedge, but if I worked in a pharmacutical center and got cancer, I think that I would need a truck for all the stuff that I would lift from that place. He's bee going in for tests for the past 2 or 3 weeks, so he knew something was wrong. I tried telling my g/f that it was probably something like pneumonia or something. My dad had that 3 years ago and it was hella-brutal, but it did get him to quit smoking, so that was one plus of that. So anyways, he takes all these tests and then the doctor told him that he has to come in, and preferably bring his wife, so that they can tell him the results of the tests becuase they can't tell him over the phone. So, that night, My girlfriends dad tells all the kids that they have to take the weekend off work (it's Wednesday night when this is all happening) so that they can go to some resort in the Catskills. Meanwhile, I'm sure everyone is hystarical crying because they can only envision the worst. So there they go, for a weekend along to the Catskills. He tells them all at dinner or something that he has lung cancer and I can only imagine how everyone took it.

So that brings us to right now. He is taking a week off of work and taking all these tests and is already planning on the chemotherapy and surgery. I just hope that it's so early, that they can take their little x-acto knives and cut it out, and then punch that cancer right in the face; maybe put it in a jar and put a little piece of tape on the jar that says: This is the thing that almost destroyed the Keltz family. That's what I would do. I always want to save everything that comes out of me surgically, like when I got my teeth pulled, I wanted those, or when I got surgery for that time that I was in shop class and a piece of shrapnel went in my hand and I had to have it removed. They are like little adventures.

In closing:

FUCK YOU CANCER